The Love Surrender

“And may you have the power to understand, as all God’s people should, how wide, how long, how high, and how deep his love is.” – Ephesians 3:18

Let me tell you a story about love.

Anyone who has followed this blog knows that I’ve not had the best of luck with men. To say that an air of friction has permeated most of my relationships is an understatement. I’ve always felt that I was one of two pieces that did not fit, but was put together anyway by sheer force or temporary glue.

But you read it right. It’s me, telling you a story about love.

You see, when I started to get to know Jesus, I also began to know about love. It’s not the clingy, desperate type that ties you up and tires you out…rather it is quiet, calm and reassuring. It is exactly as Jesus is, with none of the crazy, mad episodes that we see in the movies and carry over to our own lives.

Love is Jesus, accurately, perfectly and in every sense of the word. One cannot exist without the other. The truth is, without knowing Jesus, then you may not know true love. “Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” 1 John 4:8 

That’s just the way it is. So if you don’t know love yet…then be very, very excited.

Because  this Love…the real kind… is pretty amazing. It is not temporary nor is it conditional. It is not cheap nor is it store-bought. This love (yes, the real kind) was made available and was proclaimed to each and every one of us when Jesus died on the cross 2000 years ago. God’s love for us is so deep, so vast, and so great that it goes beyond any mortal’s understanding.

As a popular hymn goes:

Where can I run from Your love?
If I climb to the heavens You are there;
If I fly to the sunrise or sail beyond the sea,
still I’d find You there.

The question is, are we ready to do the same for Him? To give up everything we know about love, about life, and about ourselves?  To give all these up (die onto ourselves) and offer our whole lives up to God?

When I met my husband, I had a concept of the “perfect man” for me. I had his face, his voice, even his table manners mapped out in my head. This image was THE man I was going to marry, no one else. So when I met Dondi in church one Sunday, I hardly paid any attention. He didn’t fit the image of “The Man” I was going to marry, after all. He pursued me and I resisted. I had it all planned out, remember? There was only one problem. I felt no peace with my decision. (Which is what usually happens when we try to sidestep our Heavenly Father, anyway.)

So I did what I had to do. By God’s grace, I surrendered it up to Him.

“Jesus, I lift this relationship up to you for You know what’s best for me. I pray for wisdom, for strength and for discernment regarding this man. Let not my own selfish and shallow desires get in the way of your will, for my understanding is nothing compared to the infinite beauty of Your plans for me…”

God moved so swiftly, so unmistakably and so directly that in five months (just last Sunday, actually), we had gotten married. It was a beautiful garden ceremony made possible entirely by faith. My husband and I had no resources to begin with. But our friends held our hands and told us to stay in faith, that provision would come, in His perfect timing. So my husband and I did and guess what? Come wedding day, resources came, no, poured in, in the form of help, gifts and finances…so much so that we even had much left over.

So what is my point?

If I had relied solely on MY concept of love, MY vision of the perfect man, MY idea of what was best for me…If I had refused to rest on that rock-steady assurance that God has it all figured out,  then I would have completely missed out on this beautiful marriage that I have now.

As human beings, our concept of life, of death, of the universe, of anything, really….is nothing, but dust in the wind.  No matter how much we try and lead ourselves into believing that we know it all, or that we know enough, we don’t and we never will. So when it comes to love, the single, most important thing here on this earth, the one thing that truly matters, dare we entrust it to our own measly understanding?

I don’t think so.

So what is my story about Love?

That it isn’t about me at all.

It’s about Him…..Like everything good and perfect in this world.

Go by your own strength and you will tire. Go by your own ideals and you will fall short. Go by your own feelings and you will end up chasing wind.

So I say it again….Let Jesus in. 

Then get ready to experience the greatest love story that you will ever tell.

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” – Proverbs 3:5